[Published in Anodis http://anodis.com/nota.asp?id=10228 ]
Once you've discovered that your sexuality is different from that of your partners in the school, which taught you your parents at home and you see displayed continuously in film and television, the hardest part is trying to make that difference is not as noticeable as for others to see. While blooming around you remarks against homosexuals and bisexuals and their loving ways, the only certainty is clear that you do not agree that 'feel' that you love differently. Consequently, enter your lifestyle to the discretion of the closet.
usually called "being in the closet" to live a very discrete in not integrate your homosexuality with other areas of your life, such as school, family, work and so, being in the closet you handle that virtually anyone know you're a woman or a gay man, so determined to avoid facing uncomfortable situations for others. This leads consequently to an ongoing discernment about what people are going to become exceptionally share in your love style, and that people continue to ignore that you are gay. The more people you share in this, more out of the closet you are, and acquire greater freedom to live your sexuality.
Discretion about sexuality is not heterosexual, usually has more to do with prudence than any other factor, it is a kind of automatic reflex is activated in response to the first signs of homoeroticism itself. With the passage of time and exploration by trial and error, men and homosexual women are discovering they can expect from the people around you, what tend to be the reactions of solidarity, discrimination, understanding, indifference, love, or so that expect from such and such people, and based on that decide to open gradually and fully share its way of life, including his homosexual orientation. This is "coming out", which although usually handled as a single act that runs after a thorough personal reflection, we can say that rather corresponds to a continuum of choices, each of them according to the person you are interacting and depending on the scenario very specific question that is, we opened our sexual orientation for people that we are significant, those with whom we want to establish intimacy, as our family, friends and others.
In general, we can hardly find a person, male or female, who is generally out of the closet: at work, with family, at school. There are scenarios where disclosing this sexual difference can be socially counterproductive, resulting in an open hostile treatment or discrimination by our partner in a context within which we would have much to lose, perhaps as in our employment or office for a major procedure. Every day each person avoids showing something of themselves in order to interact with others: some people do not mention that there are Mormons until they are invited to a Catholic ceremony, others omit not like dogs against Canine members of any association, and some simply avoid talking about certain issues they know that will lead to coexistence an awkward position, as often happens with politics, football and religion. Is a question of diplomacy.
Staying in the closet has its advantages: he is gay is not to be questioned by, or given different treatment because others assume a priori that someone is heterosexual. However will have to deal with those occasions his friends present a friend or a friend, because you are constantly having no spouse, or where the conversation ends up turning around relations between the sexes, but if it is business, there is no major problem.
What is a bigger problem is when it comes to people who really matter who wants to introduce a friend who is unaware that a girl is gay or ask him about his girlfriend, with sincere interest to gay men unaware of their erotic orientation. Over time, the need to lie to the people you want emotionally close, it's an inconvenience, but growing, while conversely, there is also a need to share the good experiences that occur around the heart and love, and equally situations that are not so good in this area of \u200b\u200bemotions. Efficiently protects the closet, but also isolated.
What is a bigger problem is when it comes to people who really matter who wants to introduce a friend who is unaware that a girl is gay or ask him about his girlfriend, with sincere interest to gay men unaware of their erotic orientation. Over time, the need to lie to the people you want emotionally close, it's an inconvenience, but growing, while conversely, there is also a need to share the good experiences that occur around the heart and love, and equally situations that are not so good in this area of \u200b\u200bemotions. Efficiently protects the closet, but also isolated.
People who have their lives completely immersed in the closet, finally immersed in an isolation that leads to loneliness and a growing disconnect with others. Sharing is part of human nature, but human beings also involves choose who is to be shared, in the case of homoerotic sexuality itself, the same choice is essential to include in our lives to people who specifically have won, or with those who simply seems to us to share. Doing so is a personal decision that nobody can question.
This is a blog post http://xiu-cuautli.blogspot.com/ 
